GAY MEN & FRIENDSHIP: THE ELUSIVE GOAL?

I would like to know your opinion on a delicate subject, friendship with other gay men. It is something that too many of us have a hard time with. I’m not talking about party friends, or friends to go for a coffee with, I’m talking about real friends, TRUE gay friends. Friends that you know more than their name, friends that you can share happy or sad things with, friends that you can have a real connection with, friends that inspire you.

Do you think many of us have the Motto: better be alone than in bad company as a friendship mantra? Why do you think many of us find it is so hard to have true, real lasting friendships with gay men?

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4 Comments Add yours

  1. galby68 says:

    Great thought exercise!
    For me, I’m fortunate to have a couple of solid, deep friendships with gay men, but most of my friends are straight.
    I think a lot about this and usually fall back to the rarity of straight men having true friendships with women. Billy Crystal delivered a good synopsis of that reality in When Harry Met Sally when he said that the barrier between men and women becoming friends was sex. It didn’t matter that the woman didn’t want to have sex with the man and it had never even occurred to her, the man had already thought of it and the potential friendship was already doomed.
    With gay men, that’s X2. If one of them finds the other even remotely attractive, then the true friendship is never gonna happen because the sex thing is already out there…

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  2. renudepride says:

    Almost all of my friends ARE other same gender loving men. Aside from our families, I don’t think either one of us (my spouse and I) have any real friends who aren’t GLBTQ. It’s weird, but we have problems with non-GLBTQ folks. Naked hugs!

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  3. pacemindblog says:

    I have a good mix of gay and straight friends but I think it can be difficult to make gay friends and just be friends the attraction of sex can often get in the way whether it is both ways or just one it can often complicate things.

    Like

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