So I found myself a good one and he’s giving, thoughtful, committed, and consistent and you’re happy together. However, I thought the good relationships don’t need a sane amount of work to keep the relationship strong.
I used to roll my eyes at the people who claimed they rarely argue and called each other “babe.” I just assumed that it really wasn’t possible for two human beings to like each other and get along most of the time, and I thought these unicorns-and-rainbows couples must be insufferable or they were just plain liars. More likely the latter, right?
But now I’m kind of one of these jerks, living with someone who’s thoughtful, considerate, and reasonable traits that, given my relationship history, still blow me away. Meeting him reminded me that I did see an example of a successful same sex couple growing up.
But I don’t want to take my relationship for granted or neglect it. The thing: I don’t see it as work if it’s something you want to do, but what if I don’t want to do the work? What if things are perfectly imperfect and I don’t feel the need to constantly work on our relationship when it’s quite fine?
I don’t want to be flippant and imply that I have it easy because I have someone who gets and supports me completely. I just don’t like the effort that goes with “working” on a relationship. Am not deserving of my current relationship?