¿HOW DO YOU RESPOND WHEN A FRIEND IS ACCUSED OF BEING A RAPIST OR SEXUAL PREDATOR?

Sexual consent has been a topic that’s been increasingly visible in the news and in the social consciousness. It’s not, of course, that sexual assault has suddenly become more of an issue — rather, we are seeing a rise in victims feeling safe enough to speak out publicly on a scale they never have before. With more survivors speaking out, we’re seeing an expectation for accountability also emerging… but there’s not a lot of information on how to make that happen.

The thing is, sexual abusers tend to surround themselves with people who will apologize for them, who will cover for them, who will defend them. They require camouflage in the form of a group of people who will confirm that the abuser is “such a nice guy.” It’s how they can repeatedly get away with violating boundaries and how they can escape being outed or banished. It’s how they ensure their victims won’t be believed.

You know that you don’t want to enable rapists or other abusers, but you’re not entirely sure how to react ethically when someone you’re close to is accused of these behaviors. If you’re confused about next steps — knowing you should take some but unsure what they should be, what do you do when your friend is called out for his aggressive behavior by other men? 

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One Comment Add yours

  1. renudepride says:

    It depends on the situation and the circumstances. Sometimes, the only response is: “I’m here if you need me.” Naked hugs!

    Like

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